18 Weeks, 3 Days

Thursday 29 August 2013

Two posts in two days, I wouldn't expect that to happen too often! Baby brain has been great at making me forget to update this blog and I'm sure it will continue to do so as this pregnancy progresses.

First of all I wanted to post an updated bump photo that Bio Mum took this morning. Here is the bump at 18 weeks and 3 days,

It may not look like a pregnant belly, but it does feel like one!

In possibly exciting news I think, although I am not 100% sure, that I may have felt Lil Dash move yesterday...twice! First was almost like a tiny little flutter, that could have been a little muscle twitch, about 3 or 4 cms down from my belly button. The second was after work when Bio Mum and I were having a lie down before heading out for dinner. I rolled onto my side and while lying still I swear I felt a little flutter again. 

Now I might have just been imagining it, or it could have been many other things, but I am hoping it was our Lil Dash. I really can't wait until I can feel Dash move and be certain it was our baby. I also can't wait until Bio Mum can feel the movement too. I am so excited to share this with her.

In my post yesterday I forgot to tell you all about the beautiful print we bought to go in Lil Dash's room. I have to credit a truly amazing artist Marja-Leena Montone (website is marjaleena.com) for this creation. Here is 'Bed Time'

We just loved the colours in the print and think it will be a great basis for the rest of the nursery. The walls will be white and the colour will be in the accessories. We even ordered some samples of curtains/blinds we like that will go with the print!

I can't wait to get into that nursery! It is going to be so special to create this space for Lil Dash with Bio Mum. Maybe the nesting is starting?

Off to see Dr B next week so will definitely post again then if not sooner!

18 Weeks, 2 Days

Well it has been quite a while since my last post, that is very neglectful of me. So much has happened in the last few weeks and I will do my best to update this with all the goings on and such.

Currently we are at 18 weeks and doing well. Lil Dash is still growing away in there and I even have a small bump now (although it really does just look like I'm getting fat, still not very pregnant looking). Here is the bump from 19 August (so 17 weeks)

I'll aim to get some more recent photos once there is actually something to see!

So a few weeks ago we got some bad news about my mother. This is one of the reasons for my lack of blogging, that and exhaustion. On 5 August my sister called me to tell me that Mum has been diagnosed with cancer. It is quite advanced, inoperable cancer in her lungs, bones and breasts. Unsurprisingly this news was quite a shock. I remember how I felt when I found out she has Alzheimer's Disease, this was even more devastating. 

I felt (and still feel) angry. It's like the Alzheimer's robbed us of who our mother was and now cancer is robbing us of time with her. It seems so unfair that Mum should be lumped with so much. 

The decision has been made to not treat the cancer and to not tell Mum about it. At the moment she is completely asymptomatic and in no pain, thankfully. We feel that the distress that this information will cause Mum is not worth the possible benefits of telling her. 

I have to admit that one of the first thoughts that slammed into my head on hearing the news was what if Mum isn't alive when Lil Dash is born? What if my mother never gets to meet her first grandchild? That is about the most heartbreaking thing imaginable. It is making me cry just to think about it. 

Onto something else. On 7 August 2013 we had an appointment with our OB, Dr B, which was quite frustrating through no fault of Dr B's. We went in to see Dr B and he started talking to us about the results of our 12 week screening. Bio Mum instantly picked up on the fact that there was an error, and that despite being told countless times, the doctor at the imaging place had calculated our potential risks based on my age, not Bio Mum's. As Lil Dash and I share no genetic material at all, using my age (which is 8 years younger than Bio Mum's) is not only incorrect, but a waste of time.

Dr B immediately got on the phone to the imaging place to get a revised report. Dr B was almost as angry as we were! We were told they would recalculate and then send though a revised report within 10 minutes, 35 minutes late we finally got the report back. Thankfully all the numbers were still within a good range, but they had certainly changed when compared with the numbers from the calculations made using my age. It was a stressful wait for those revised results, let me tell you!

During our appointment, Dr B did a quick ultrasound and Lil Dash was looking very happy in there. Dr B tried to see Bub's gender, but Lil Dash has other ideas. Hopefully at our next appointment on 4 September we'll get to find out! I can't wait. I still think Lil Dash is a girl, but either way I'm going to be happy. I just want to meet our little one. 

Almost half way now and time is flying. Before we know it Lil Dash is going to be entering the world and changing our lives forever. 

13 Weeks 6 Days!!

Sunday 28 July 2013

Tomorrow we hit 14 weeks and wow what an amazing, tumultuous, stressful, exciting, nauseating time it has been! The last 3 and a bit months have been a roller coaster of morning sickness, keeping this big news secret and worry about Bub. It has been intense to say the least.

The last couple of weeks  have been pretty special for Bio Mum and I. On Saturday 13 July 2013, we went to have our 12 week scan (at 11 weeks, 5 days) and bloods taken for the screening. It was certainly a day full of excitement and nerves (oh and a very full bladder for me). The ultrasound tech was lovely, which was a big plus. I wouldn't want someone we weren't comfortable with in the room with us during such an intimate and special moment.

Let me tell you that our Little Dash is one cheeky little monkey! Lil Dash was wriggling around and not moving into position for the tech. At one point Lil Dash had both hands in front of his/her little face which I think was either 'jazz hands' or the little one saying 'please stop taking pictures of me'. Either way is was heartbreakingly cute. Here's a scan picture of 'jazz hands' or 'spirit fingers'

Bub even rolled over at one point so their back was facing the ultrasound wand. Lil Dash is very like both Mummies, neither of which like having their photo taken at all! Here is a scan picture of cheeky little Dash's protest as having their photo taken

And here is a pic of Lil Dash's face. A face we are already besotted with

So the scan was amazing. We got to spend quite a long time watching our little one moving around in there, we also got to see and hear their little heart beating away like crazy. The tech was great and very reassuring that everything looked normal and as it should.

After the scan I was blissfully allowed to go empty my bladder (it was getting kind of desperate there for a while) and then after some questions off we went to get some of my blood taken. With that done it was time to wait for the result of the screening. We were told we could expect results within 4 or 5 days...9 very stressful days later we finally got the results. Thankfully all is very well with Lil Dash. The odds of Lil Dash having any chromosomal issues are very slim, slim enough to even ease Bio Mum's mind!

As for me, it may sound ridiculous but I just had this feeling all along that Lil Dash was fine. I just knew that our baby was great and that there was nothing to worry about. I have no idea how I knew, I just knew.

We also told Bio Mum's parent's, which was great. They were thrilled and it was so nice to have it out in the open. It's been so hard keeping it a secret!! This is the biggest event in our lives and it has been such a challenge to keep it to ourselves! Well mostly to ourselves, we did tell a few people along the way!

The reactions we have received have been wonderful. People have been so excited for us and now that its out in the open it feels so very real, not that it didn't before, but now its different. Its not just us anymore, this is something our friends and family are sharing with us now and that makes it even more precious!

I want to send out thanks to the wonderful people who are supporting us and sharing our journey. We are so grateful to you all and are so blessed to have you, just like Lil Dash will be lucky to have you too.

Week 11, Day 2

Wednesday 10 July 2013

Bio Mum gave me a cold and then left me to go interstate for work for four days! That's kind of mean right? Joking, well about the mean part because she absolutely made me sick and then left me on my lonesome. It's only been a day and I miss her like crazy. I am kind of needy at the moment, damn hormones! Poor Moo is having to deal with my need for company until Bio Mum returns on Friday.

The cold hasn't been too bad, the sore throat has been the killer especially seeing as I can't take anything other than panadol. I'm also exhausted at the moment and all I really want to do is lie in bed or on the couch and watch DVDs and nap. Sadly work gets in the way of that. Damn work!

On the morning sickness front I am feeling a bit better (thank god!). I am still not back to normal, but I am eating and generally not feeling like throwing up all day. I still find I need to eat very regularly to keep the sickness at bay, but its better than it was. It tends to get worse in the evenings, maybe because I'm tired. Dr B halved my dosage of Zofran and so far that has been ok. Today is a bit of a test. I took my half a wafer this morning and usually I take the other half 12 hours later, but today I am meeting a friend for dinner right after work so won't be able to take the wafer until later after I get home. We'll see how that goes.

Looking forward to dinner tonight with my friend Erina. It will be nice to catch up, I have been a little reclusive due to feeling like shit run over twice for the last 2 months. 

We have our 12 week scan on Saturday, which is both nerve-racking and exciting. Following the scan I'll get my bloods done and then soon we'll know our risk of any issues with Little Dash. I have a feeling that everything is ok, but I'll feel a lot better once we get the results. I am looking forward to seeing Little Dash again and hearing the heart beat for the first time...I might cry. 

I can't believe we hit 12 weeks on Monday, it is surreal to be here. I remember when I was 5 weeks and the morning sickness was really starting to kick me in the arse it seemed like we would never get out of the first trimester and now we're almost there! Little Dash is becoming so real to me, I can't wait to see out Bub again this weekend!

I'll be sure to update with how the scan went and any ultrasound pics we get!

10 Weeks, 3 Days

Thursday 4 July 2013

This will be a fairly short update, mostly I wanted to give a status report on Moo's surgery. 

All is going well in the post surgery recovery. Moo was a very groggy dog when I picked her up from the vet on Tuesday night and stayed in her adorably stoned state for the rest of the night. The incision is quite a bit bigger than we thought it would be...and kind of looks like the work experience kid stitched her up, but it doesn't seem to be bothering her much at all.

Her appetite is well and truly unaffected, that's for sure. 

I was home with her yesterday (two days off this week with morning sickness...yeah still not much fun) and she was fine so today she is outside with her coat on to a) keep her warm and b) stop her being able to get at those stitches!

Like I said above, morning sickness is still causing me some problems. It is exhausting and emotionally draining to feel sick all the time. Eating is such a chore. I eat I feel sick, I don't eat I feel sicker. Last night I felt so sick I struggled to bring myself to eat much of anything even though I knew it would help to a degree. I really hope this sickness will end soon. On my way home I will be swinging by our OB's office to pick up another script for Zofran, hopefully I won't need it for too much longer. 

Blood test day at the clinic, I think there should be only one or two blood tests left! All is good with the levels, now they only test the progesterone.

Well that's all for now!

9 Weeks, 4 Days

Friday 28 June 2013

Wednesday we had our first appointment with Dr B, our OB, and wow is he great! I really liked him and felt really at ease with him. He was great as putting my concerns to rest, I think he may have even eased some of Bio Mum's worries! Dr B has an easy going manner and a calmness that I think will work well for us.

He was great about answering our questions (and there were quite a few of them) and put my mind at ease about the majority of things that have been worrying me. He did an ultrasound and said everything looks good, which was great to hear. It was so amazing to see little Dash on the monitor again. Even in just a few weeks since our last scan they look more baby like.

One of the things I liked best about Dr B was that he made it very clear that his aim is for our baby to be born healthy (also for me to be healthy too) and that he is willing to go about that however we feel is best. He is open to natural births, drug-free or with drugs, or even an elective caesarean if that's what we want. I'm not sure yet. I think I want to wait, see how Little Dash goes before we make a decision on that one. I know a lot of women feel that they want the experience of a natural birth, I'm not sure I am one of those women. The only thing I know is that I want our little Bub to be born healthy and in the least stressful means possible. I honestly don't feel like I would be missing anything if we did decide to have an elective caesarean, but for now I want to wait and see. 

I had lunch with my friend T on Thursday and couldn't help myself, I had to tell her about Little Dash! I am struggling so much keeping to myself and I just had to tell her. She was so excited for us, which means so much. We are lucky to have such amazing friends and family to support us through this. I'll be telling another person this weekend, my Dad. He is going to be in town for some training and I've decided to tell him. I really wanted to tell him face to face and given that he lives on the other end of the country this is probably my only opportunity to do that. I am going to ask him to keep it to himself for now (I am happy for him to tell my step-mum though) so that I can tell our relatives when I'm ready.

I figure while he's here he may want to go out and have dinner and stuff, but given my morning/all day sickness and all around exhaustion that is probably not something I am up for so telling him will explain why I am lazing around on the couch and not really eating properly! I am excited and nervous to tell him. I know he'll be happy, but I am nervous telling people before the first trimester is over. It's all going to be ok though. I know it.

So it was blood test day again yesterday and all is looking good. In a few short weeks the Clinic will stop working with me, which is sad, but I am looking forward to not having my blood taken every week. I am so grateful to them for what they have done for us. Without them we wouldn't have Little Dash growing and thriving in my tummy and we wouldn't be experiencing this challenging, but also amazing time. I will forever be grateful to them and Dr D for helping us on our way to becoming parents.

Poor Bio Mum is still really sick with a nasty cold and is at home to hopefully get better today. I hope she is getting lots of sleep and drinking lots of fluids. Its always hard when the person you love is sick, especially when you aren't 100% yourself. Fingers crossed Bio Mum is on the mend soon and feeling loads better.

In other not so good news, we took Moo to the vet on Wednesday night as she has been scratching her ears a lot and found out that not only does she have infections in both ears, she also has a cancerous tumour on her side. Poor Baby! Moo will be having surgery on Tuesday to remove the tumour, which thankfully looks like it won't have spread. When the vet left the room after telling us I got all teary (lets blame the hormones!) and since Wednesday Moo has been sleeping in our room with us. I'll update with how the surgery goes.

So that's where we're at. 12 week scan and bloods are coming up in July and we are back to see Dr B in early August. Fingers, toes and everything crossed that all continues to go well and that Little Dash keeps thriving in there! Also eagerly anticipating feeling better soon and morning sickness going away. 

Happy Friday!

9 Weeks, 1 Day

Tuesday 25 June 2013

I can't believe we are at 9 weeks already, although I am looking forward to the end of the first trimester so we can tell people and hopefully the morning sickness will get better!

It was a rough night last night, I felt sick all day and then once I got home I just couldn't stop myself throwing up. It was the first time throwing up since I started on the Zofran so that wasn't great. I managed to pop some little blood vessels around my eyes while vomiting too, great huh? I ended up spending the rest of the night in bed, unable to bring myself to eat anything except my hydralyte icy-pole and later an up & go drink. Other than that it was just water and feeling miserable.

Today I am still feeling pretty rough and have struggled to eat much of anything today. I am trying to keep getting food in, but its hard. I hope all this sickness means we are having a very healthy baby!

Poor Bio Mum has a nasty cold at the moment, which isn't good for a couple of reasons. 1) I hate seeing her feeling so crappy, 2) I haven't been able to really look after her too well as I have been nursing my morning sickness and 3) I so don't want to catch that cold myself! Poor Bio Mum! She was sick only a few weeks ago so this is kind of ridiculous. Fingers crossed she gets better fast.

Tomorrow we have our appointment with Dr B, our OB. I am both excited and nervous to be honest. I hope it all goes well and will post with how it all went in the next couple of days. I hope we get another scan, I want to see our little Dash again!

I'm having lunch with my friend T on Thursday, which will be great as she and her girlfriend K have been overseas for the last 2 months...of course when we last saw them I wasn't actually pregnant yet. Now I so badly want to tell her, but I am determined to wait. It's just so hard sometimes!